{"id":9933,"date":"2020-07-28T00:46:06","date_gmt":"2020-07-28T00:46:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/akefestival.org\/archive\/?p=9933"},"modified":"2020-07-28T06:27:23","modified_gmt":"2020-07-28T06:27:23","slug":"short-fiction-coming-of-age-davina-philomena-kawuma","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/akefestival.org\/archive\/short-fiction\/coming-of-age-davina-philomena-kawuma\/","title":{"rendered":"Coming of Age  &#8211; Davina Philomena Kawuma"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>COMING OF AGE<\/p>\n<p><strong>Davina Philomena Kawuma<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Age 8.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The student teacher\u2019s slap leaves me in a daze. Why me? I\u2019m usually compliant. I\u2019m always first in class. Why not Sienna, my desk-mate who has been at the bottom of the end-of-term reports for two years now, and who was responsible for 90 percent of the \u201cnoise-making\u201d in the first place?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>This is the first time a teacher, student or otherwise, has slapped me in front of the class. I\u2019m enraged but what can I do except ask for permission to go to the toilet where I can cry in private?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Later at home, I duck my mother\u2019s all-knowing eyes and lock myself in the bathroom. It takes a while for the mirror to convince me that the student teacher\u2019s palm left no print on my cheek. I cry some more but this time from relief. Then I leave the bathroom and cross the corridor to enter my brother\u2019s room. He is playing Mortal Kombat when I start to tell him about the slap. It doesn\u2019t seem as if he\u2019s listening until he says, \u201cSorry about that.\u201d He switches to combat mode and hands me the second control pad. He says if I can beat him he\u2019ll let me ride his bicycle. \u201cBy the way, if you didn\u2019t know,\u201d he says, while I\u2019m choosing a player, \u201cStudent teachers are stupid.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>During break time the next morning, I ask who wants to switch desks with me. Several classmates raise their hands. Sienna\u2019s father is Ugandan but her mother is \u201cwhite.\u201d In this school, people like Sienna are practically gods; who wouldn\u2019t want to sit next to them and pet their endless hair? Eventually I choose Emma who immediately transfers her books to my desk. I can tell from the way Sienna looks at me that we will never speak to each other again.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Age 12.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The headmaster announces at assembly that we must cut our hair to within a centimetre of our scalps because we need to \u201cconcentrate\u201d on our preparations for the PL exams due at the end of the year. It has come to his attention that we are spending too much time \u201cmaking our hair\u201d and too little time reading for the exams that will determine which high school we will attend; we can\u2019t get into good universities and get good jobs and drive good cars and build good houses if we don\u2019t go to a good high school. And admission into a good high school requires excellent grades. We have been the best-performing school in Kampala for the last ten years. How much more concentration do we need? &#8211; we wonder amongst ourselves &#8211; and how come the Indian girls and the girls with \u201cwhite\u201d mothers get to keep their hair?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Age 15.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m in my third year of high school. I\u2019ve become quite good at subjects I dislike (Literature, Christian Religious Education, French, Home Economics) and even better at subjects I like (Physics, Chemistry, Biology and Mathematics), despite the consensus that \u201cgirls don\u2019t have the brains for sciences.\u201d I like Physics best, so much so that I\u2019m doing a lot of \u2018extra-curricular reading.\u2019 My Physics teacher assumes my interest in blackbodies is related to concerns about what short answer questions will appear in the CE exams next year. \u201cBlackbodies are not on the O\u2019 Level syllabus,\u201d he says. \u201cIn any case, blackbodies are hypothetical. Do you know what hypothetical means?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, sir,\u201d I say.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cGood girl,\u201d he says.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Age 16.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m the rate-determining step. Teachers often turn to me and say, \u201cHave you understood?\u201d If I say that I\u2019ve understood, they say, \u201cYou\u2019ll explain to the rest\u201d &#8211; before moving quickly on to the next topic because, in this school, the worst that can happen is for a teacher not to finish the syllabus.\u00a0 Sometimes, after I\u2019ve caught a classmate\u2019s pleading eyes, I say I\u2019ve not understood, just so a teacher can run through everything again at a slower pace. Typically, I drag everything out until I feel that even the most confused classmate, who will have sent a note saying \u201cI don\u2019t click what this guy is saying!\u201d has grasped the concept.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Age 19.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m a fresher at campus. I\u2019m feeling so grown up that I\u2019ve decided to treat my hair despite stern warnings from concerned family members that the chemicals in relaxers will fry my brains. Besides, they add, \u201cGod is not stupid.\u201d If God had meant for the descendants of Ham to have hair so straight and long, he\u2019d have created us with it in the first place.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Age 22.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m a few months into my post-graduate internship. I\u2019ve tired of braids so I\u2019m wearing wigs and weaves, if only to rest my hair. One morning, a workmate pulls me aside to say I shouldn\u2019t wear wigs because they make me \u201clook older,\u201d which is apparently the last thing I want if I intend to find \u201ca good African man.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cA real African man wants a natural-looking African woman,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Age 25.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Our new boss, Noah Cohen, has come all the way from the US of A. In the toilets, days later, I discover just how unpopular he already is. Apparently, the staff are unimpressed that the board chose him over the current deputy director, the better educated Ugandan woman with several years\u2019 experience in managing public-private partnerships in the health sector. \u201cWhy is a 26-year-old with a bachelor\u2019s degree in English Literature and Modern Languages running a pharmaceutical company?\u201d is what people want to know.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I learn from Noah that what I am is \u201ca black woman,\u201d which confuses and surprises me because to be honest, \u201cblack\u201d is not a label that makes any sense to me. We don\u2019t refer to ourselves as \u201cblack\u201d around here but, hey, he\u2019s the boss so what can I do but smile while he goes on about how \u201cstrong\u201d we \u201cblack women\u201d are?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I might be \u201ca closet white.\u201d This is according to my workmates, who are convinced that I \u201cread too much,\u201d which is a betrayal, because reading is many things but it\u2019s definitely not an \u201cauthentically African\u201d pastime. Ours is an oral culture. We don\u2019t bury our heads in books: we talk to each other. I should stop being so anti-social, and what-have-you. \u201cI\u2019m not being anti-social,\u201d I want to say. It\u2019s just that 3:30 \u2013 4:30, in the cafeteria, while eating a late lunch, is usually the only time I can catch up on my reading without anyone making a fuss.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat is lateral thinking?\u201d they ask.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s what this book is about.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cBut what is it?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>I explain.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhy are you reading a book about lateral thinking?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Because I can.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou did sciences, right?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>I did.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhy are you reading a book about arts? Won\u2019t you confuse your brain?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2019ve heard that the way to hide things from blacks is to put them in books,\u201d Noah says.<\/p>\n<p>The meeting is going badly, as usual; and the \u201cjoke\u201d about \u201cblack\u201d people and books, clearly his idea of an icebreaker, worsens the mood. For the rest of the meeting, staff members keep their eyes glued to their smartphones.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>As one of Noah\u2019s new \u201cterms of employment,\u201d we are supposed to read and summarise one book a month. This month\u2019s assigned book is \u2018Jewish Wisdom for Business Success: Lessons from the Torah and Other Ancient Texts.\u2019 Because I\u2019m the only one that\u2019s read the book, I\u2019m exempted from working next weekend. If we are not careful, Noah says, salary increments will soon depend on whether or not we have read at least three books every month.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>We are at a \u201cworking dinner\u201d in a Thai restaurant in Nakasero when Noah admits that the \u201creal reason\u201d he\u2019s in Uganda is to find \u201ca black wife.\u201d He has only ever dated \u201cblack women,\u201d none from \u201cthe motherland\u201d though. His mission, should he choose to accept it, is to \u201cdilute his genes.\u201d Said dilution will of course cost him dearly as the only way his children can be Jewish is if their mother is Jewish. I advise him to marry a Ugandan Jewish woman. I tell him about the Bayudaya in Mbale\u2014the only community of Ugandans known to practise Judaism. I assure him that the Bayudaya celebrate all the important Jewish festivals. \u201cA group of Jewish Americans helped build one of their synagogues,\u201d I add, for effect, but he remains unimpressed.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m no longer just \u201ca black woman\u201d; I\u2019m also, depending on Noah\u2019s mood, a \u201cMelanin Goddess\u201d or an \u201cAfrican Queen.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Age 26.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m liberal. I\u2019m open-minded, though not so much that my brain is in any danger of falling out. Come to think of it, I might as well be \u201ca white woman.\u201d I was born on the wrong continent. I must find my way to Europe, my true motherland. (If I marry a \u201cwhite man,\u201d rather if a \u201cwhite man\u201d marries me, it\u2019ll be easier for me to secure a visa.) In short, I am technically Noah\u2019s \u201ctype.\u201d I\u2019m never going to have blonde hair, of course, but one can always wear Indian hair. By the way, did I know that you can tell how intelligent a woman is by how much fat she carries on her body? \u201cWho said?\u201d I ask. \u201cResearch. Several papers have been published,\u201d Noah says. \u201cI\u2019m tired,\u201d I say. \u201cI would like to go home now.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Age 27.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Shortly after I slap a random man for fondling my bum, I\u2019m taught what will soon become a valuable lifelong lesson: I am not white and my body does not belong to me.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>COMING OF AGE Davina Philomena Kawuma &nbsp; &nbsp; Age 8. &nbsp; The student teacher\u2019s slap leaves me in a daze. Why me? I\u2019m usually compliant. I\u2019m always first in class.&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><a class=\"btn btn-style\" href=\"https:\/\/akefestival.org\/archive\/short-fiction\/coming-of-age-davina-philomena-kawuma\/\">Continue Reading<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[42],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9933","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-short-fiction"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Coming of Age - Davina Philomena Kawuma - Ake Arts &amp; Book Festival<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/akefestival.org\/archive\/short-fiction\/coming-of-age-davina-philomena-kawuma\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Coming of Age - Davina Philomena Kawuma - Ake Arts &amp; Book Festival\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"COMING OF AGE Davina Philomena Kawuma &nbsp; &nbsp; Age 8. &nbsp; The student teacher\u2019s slap leaves me in a daze. 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